from PsychologyToday

Key points

  1. Kindness is great, but not when excessive.
  2. Being overly kind can lead us to under-delegate.
  3. We should reframe our mindset to equate kindness with empowering our people to be better in the long term.

Being kind to others is celebrated everywhere: In kindergarten classrooms, across cultures, across genders, you name it. However, when it comes to leadership, it’s important to note an important truth: Being too nice can have serious drawbacks.

It’s not because kindness is bad—it’s because, devoid of context, kindness can easily turn into people-pleasing. Often, we think of people-pleasers as brown-nosers who try to cozy up to the boss. But believe it or not, the desire to please others does not necessarily depend on hierarchy. People-pleasers who project their preferences and attitudes onto their subordinates are equally common.

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